French Press Friday

Christmas, Simplified

As I sit sipping my coffee this mornig, my mind wanders to Christmas preparations and decorating.  Last night I was at church helping the ladies group get trees up and all the decorations out.  I wish I could say it was a wonderful experience.  I wish I could say we had music playing and everyone was in the holiday spirit.  But it was just a chore that needed to be done.  Question:  How many ladies does it take to hang garland from the balcony?  Answer: Only two, but about half a dozen stand below shouting directions.  Please don't get me wrong.  We all worked well together, we chatted happily and the church is beautiful, but it wasn't, um,...a Christmasey experience, know what I mean?  Kind of felt like Charlie Brown wondering what had happened to the Christmas spirit.

So I contemplate all of that and the Christmas decorating that needs to be done at my own home.  And the word that stands out in my mind is "needs".  So I allow myself to wander down a new path of thought. 

What if...

       ...I don't get out all those boxes full of Christmas decorations?
       ...I don't scatter Christmas memorabilia all over our home?
       ...I just use candles?
       ...I only pull out the stockings?
                    And our Advent wreath?
                            And our Nativity?
       ...I suggest just decorating the tree?

And do you know what?  I feel relief.  I feel joy and anticipation returning.  I think to myself, "So this is Christmas, simplified?"  I can do this.  I think I will do this.  I think I will spend less time adding to our clutter and more time baking, making gifts, sending cards, listening to music, watching classic Christmas movies.  And cuddling on the couch with Hubby.  These things bring me joy. 

I encourage you to find your "Christmas, simplified" this year.  Go for making memories and enjoying traditions of the past.  Enjoy Advent!  Anticipate the coming of our Savior and the salvation that means for us.  Find your joy.  Check your personal headaches of the season at the door.  They aren't worth it.

Discovering Simplicity

The thought of living a simple life has been on my mind, and on my heart, for several years now.  And it seems it's been on other people's minds for a lot longer than that, according to Thoreau.  What I've been pondering so heavily the past days, though, is what does it mean to simplify?  We all read blogs and most of us have discovered Pinterest, so the ideas for simplifying are out there.  Hundreds of ideas exist for simplifying and organizing your life, everything from the baby's diapers to the influx of papers at the start of school.  And so many beautiful ways to do it all, too!  The choices and the ideas are endless and can be overwhelming. 

But while I can take someone's idea on storing pots and pans more efficiently, I cannot take someone's simple life and make it mine.  I think that has been my stumbling block.  Searching and searching for simplicity when in actuality it's been within my grasp all along.  Someone else's simple life would not fit my family; it would not fit in the home we have made.  I think finding the simple life is all about a person's vocation(s). 

I am a wife, a mother, a homemaker, a crafter, a teacher, a musician, a writer, a band mom, a scout mom.  The list could go one.  And each of these vocations keep me plenty busy, so living simply is not about being less busy, but about being busy with your own life.  Not the life someone else wants you to live.  Not the life you think you should be living, but the life you have been given.  Does being reminded of this truth make my days happier, easier, less stressful?  Not necessarily, but it is easier to see purpose in what I do.  And that makes a world of difference.

Yet, I think there is still more to living simply.  I shared a treasure of a book a while ago written by Sarah Ban Breathnach.  Since then I have found a daybook written by her which I have also found interesting and helpful.  It's called Simple Abundance and while she is a bit paganistic for me, she does a wonderful job at encouraging us to find simple pleasures for ourselves.  She encourages the reader to dream, spend time in quiet reflection, craft and create a little each day, begin a gratitude journal - which I'll share on Monday - and so much more. 

You see, living simply is not about cutting out all outside activities, nor is it about quitting your most hated household chores.  It's about working at your vocation and finding the joy within it.  All we have is a gift of God.  That means my very life is a gift.  A gift!  Something to cause me happiness and to grow me into a better person.  I tell my boyos that sometimes we have to do things we don't like.  That means sometimes I just have to spend some time ironing!  I just have to!  Like it or not.  But I can also spend some of my day cutting paper for cards and scrapbooking.  Love cutting paper!  Crazy, huh?  But that is part of who I am. 

So, my hope is that as I go through more of my ponderings of a simple life, and as I blog about it, you will share your discoveries of your own simple life.  Maybe we can simplify together.  Encourage one another to live as our authentic selves.  The women/mothers/wives/friends we have been created to be. 

 

"Though we accomplish much of what we set out to do, we sense that something is missing in our lives and - fruitlessly - search "out there" for the answers.  What's often wrong is that we are disconnected from an authentic sense of self."                

                                                                                                  -Emily Hancock


  

Discovering a Treasure

"I am better at making a home than keeping a house." 

I've decided this should be the mantra by which I live.  I think it's a terrific goal, especially for my season of life.  I want my boyos to have a home.  One that is full of memories, happy times, lessons learned, hardships fought and overcome together.  Housekeeping is not, nor has it ever been, my strong suit.  And right now it is BEYOND frustrating to keep the house looking presentable.  As Mouse has now learned to say... at the appropriate times... with a grin on his face, "What?  We're boys!!"  Yes.  Yes, you are.  So, I want to focus on being a homemaker and not a housekeeper.  Please, if you plan on visiting me, know that you will be walking into a home that is less than perfect.  At least by my standards.  If you are the kind of person who can keep your home clean, than more power to you!  I congratulate you.  I tip my hat to you.  Quite seriously!!!  And if I were to enter your home, I'm sure I would envy you and your orderly home significantly.  Oh I love an orderly, quiet, peaceful home.  Remember, I am an introvert.  Quiet.  Calm.  Nice reading atmosphere.  Those are the things that help me rejuvenate.  I just can't seem to get it to be a reality in my home!  So.  I have my room where I retreat to read, write and craft.  How spoiled am I?  The rest of the house....yeah.  The rest of the house.  Oh my, do I digress.  Let's get back on track, shall we?

A home maker.  A maker of the home.  An instigator of celebrations.  A preserver of memories.  A provider of stability.  So many different thoughts come to mind.  There is something new in every day, yet something predictable and familiar with the passing of the seasons, both in the church year and outside our door.  I want to honor those changes, those opportunities for celebration.  I want to acknowledge both the present and the future.  I want to remember the past.  I want to teach my boys to do the same.

I have met some incredible women who do that already in their homes.  I have been listening, reading, taking notes, making plans.  And I have learned, at long last, to make the changes gradually.  I cannot do it all right out of the starting gate.  I will pick and choose the fun we add to our lives.  I will start with this summer.  I've been storing ideas for Summer Camp, my style.  Basically I have been gathering ideas for crafts, activities, field trips, family projects, and even fun recipes that we can do together through out the summer.  One of my resources has been this treasure:

 Mrs. Sharp's Traditions: Reviving Victorian Family Celebrations of Comfort & Joy 

This book is wonderful!  I found it on the shelf at the library one day.  The title made me smile and I knew I had to bring it home.  Mrs. Sharp is a fictional victorian character who is full of advice and lessons in how to - in my words - "make a home".  She takes the reader through the year and the seasons, retelling stories of the celebrations and traditions of victorian times.  Did you know in victorian times it was considered the "in thing" to be at home with your children?  There were books and magazines devoted to helping the lady of the house, and the mother of the children.  The American Woman's Home, written in 1869 by Catherine Beecher, called the woman's role "as sacred and important as any ordained to man."  Godey's Lady's Book,  written in 1860,  considered Mother as "the Light of the Home."  Isn't that beautiful? 

Something specific that I had been looking for is what the author, Sarah Ban Breathnach, calls "Ceremonials for Common Days."  She says, "In this frazzled age of overscheduling, eating alone, and non-traditional child care, every family needs to create its own ceremonials for common days."  Sarah is very sensitive to the fact that we do not live in victorian times.  Things have changed and many mothers work outside the home.  She does a good job guiding mothers to little things that can be worked in to any schedule and at all times of the year.  She challenges us, as well, to be Queen of our own home and stake a claim in some family time now and again.  Even if it is just as simple as enjoying breakfast together.

As "Mrs. Sharp" takes us through the calendar, talking with the reader about Irish Soda Bread and ice cream socials, she also includes a wonderful poem for each month.  Here is the one for June:

The robins and blackbirds awoke me at dawn

Out in the wet orchard, beyond the green lawn,

For there they were holding a grand jubilee,

And no one had wakened to hear it but me.

The sweet honeysuckles were sprinkled with dew;

There were hundreds of spider-webs wet with it too,

And pussy-cat, out by the lilacs, I saw

Was stopping and shaking the drops from her paw.

I dressed in the silence as still as a mouse,

And groped down the stairway and out of the house.

There, dim in the dawning, the garden paths lay,

Where yesterday evening we shouted at play.

By the borders of box-wood, and under the trees

There was nothing astir but the birds and the bees.

And if all the world had been made just for me,

I thought, what a wonderful thing it would be.

 - K.Pyle



French Press Friday

Hubs brought gifts home from Africa.  For the two of us he brought...*drum roll please*....

COFFEE!

Isn't that red bag so very cool?  I just love it.  And inside said red bag are coffee beans, ready for the grinding.  And we thought it would be delicious. 

Not so much.  It was weak and tasteless.  Poor Hubby felt so bad.  But what was he to do about it?  Wasn't his fault.  We even gave the beans another chance by making a fresh pot using more coffee.  Hm.  Still not good. We wondered if the beans were just too old.  He said he would use the beans just to finish them up. 

"Why?!?", says I.  Life is too short to drink bad coffee!  Am I right or am I right?

So I made the Queenly decision I am so apt to do...and threw those bad beans away. 
But kept the red burlap bag.

Now the Africafe is another story.  Can you see that it is "instant" coffee?  This is the stuff Hubs drank every morning at breakfast and again at tea time while he was in Africa.  He enjoyed it, so I looked forward to trying it.  And it is pretty good!  It's a very fine, powdery coffee.  Not granular at all, like the instant coffees we are used to here in the states.  And it doesn't necessarily taste like your regular cup o' Joe.  But it has a certain richness and uniqueness to its flavor that makes it fun to sip while pretending you are enjoying the sights of the Serenghetti on an African morning.

So we'll save the Africafe to share with special guests.

 Please!  Stop by.  I'll make you a cup.



Clean it again, Sam!

link up here

Another first for me in the Land of Blog:  linking up.  We'll see how it goes.

Emily has a wonderful post at Weak and Loved.  She shares, straight from her heart, the joys and heartaches of being a mom.  This week she is collecting photos and stories of the never ending messes we deal with as moms.  "Didn't I JUST put those crayons away?  And didn't you help me do it?  How come they are all over the floor again?!"  Sound familiar? 

Bud's biggest offense is the one of dirty socks.  They are left anywhere and everywhere. 

Athletic socks AND dress socks in the mudroom.  A room he passes through every day.  Several times a day.  Where he hangs his backpack.  Every day.  Did I mention he's in this room every day?

Here are a pair trying to hide under the chair.  Hahahaha!  You cannot hide from me, the Queen of my domain.  You will meet your doom in my washing machine soon enough.

The messes of the younger two, JoJo and Mouse, are a little more interesting.  Here's an example:

Church bulletins from Sunday (one rolled into a spyglass?  sword?), a Star Wars "dude", a cup, some gray plastic piece that look like so many other gray, plastic pieces, a notebook that I'm sure has someones story started in it.

This is when it gets difficult for me.  What's OK to toss?  How do I know they are "done" with it?  What is it's something they want to show dad when he gets home?  Generally, I go by this rule:  if it's been there for more than 2 days, I throw it out.  I told you I wasn't much of a housekeeper.  I'm better at making a home than keeping a house.

So I wonder what other messes will turn up during the week?  I'm really looking forward to hearing the stories behind the messes! 

A New View

Kind of a cool picture, isn't it?  Goggle "change of perspective" and you get all kinds of interesting photos.  I like this one too, although it kind of scares me.

I was having a conversation with a friend several years ago, about how much we dislike certain household chores.  For her, it was laundry.  For me, ironing.  She had come across the notion of simply changing the way we look at our chores, the way we view them.  For example, we may not have servants to help us as in the days of Jane Austen (ahhh...).  No maid, no cook, no maidservant.  But we do have washing machines and dryers, dishwashers, electric irons, even bread machines!  So as my friend dreaded having to do laundry for her family of 5 several times a week, she decided to change her perspective.  She decided to look on that washing machine and that dryer as her servants.  All she had to do was toss in the load and some soap, push a button, crank a knob and she was done!  The hard work of actually cleaning the clothes was left up to her servant.  Not a bad deal, huh?

Now as far as ironing goes, I think I have it tougher.  (Pity me, please?)  I still have to do the work of smoothing out that blasted shirt and ironing out those little curves and wrinkles...oh, how I dislike it.  BUT.  If I challenge myself to change my perspective, I begin to see that all I need to do is plug in my iron and set it to the desired temperature.  Thank God I don't have to mess with one that needed to be heated on the stove.  I'm sure I would have burned a hole in each one of Hubby's shirts.  Oh can you imagine the mess?  And the attentiveness it required!  Nope, not for me.  After thinking on this, I look a little more lovingly on my electric iron.  Not much, but a little. 

And then there is the simple fact of showing our family how important they are to us; how much we love them.  We can use our household servants to help us be better servants to our loved ones.  I like this quote by Mary Engelbreit:

"If you don't like something, change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it."

It's Good to be Queen

Isn't this a cool coffee mug?!  Cookies on hand and ready to dunk at your convenience.  Love it!  Now where would I find one of these...

If you stepped into my kitchen you would see I have a sign that reads, "It's Good to be Queen".  I saw it at one of those little crafty gift shops.  You know the kind...they sell candles and crafted items, maybe someones homemade fudge, some plants and flowers, maybe even a few antiques.  The kind of shop that's just fun to wander through now and then because they change their items and their decor with the seasons.  Anyway, I saw that sign and I had to have it.  It serves as a good reminder no matter what kind of day I'm having.

If it's a good day, one in which I am happy to do my chores, happy to manage my household, happy to "rule my roost" then the sign confirms my state of mind.  It IS good to be queen!  And when my little princes get home, I'm putting them to work in their own little corners of my kingdom because those corners - called bedrooms - are disastrous!

Other days are not so good.  I might dread the ironing pile, the dishes left from last night, cooking supper for my picky eater only to hear him say, "I don't really think I like..."  I don't want to be queen, I don't want any more responsibilities, I don't want my workload.  I want to sleep.  That is when the purpose of the sign is different. 

"It's GOOD to be queen." 

This is my God given vocation and it is good.  I may not like all of it.  I don't have to like all of it.  But it is good, because it comes from God.  He has gifted me with my hubby and my boyos, with this home and all that is in it.  He has gifted me with the ability to be at home and care for it all.  It is GOOD to be doing this, even if I don't like it. 

Then my perspective changes...

I see God's grace...

I exhale...

and tackle that nasty pile of ironing.